Yesterday I spent the day and night at my family’s rustic cabin in the high desert mountains.
No electricity, no running water, no wifi. Hence, no email from me:)
I brought all the provisions necessary. And I had an ecstatic experience.
I enjoyed the time with myself writing, dancing, singing, playing my instruments, bathing in the creek, staring for hours at the stars, reading books, writing my own book, and collecting my soul bones.
Nature has a way of supporting us in a way that is beyond what the mind can conceive.
I didn’t have a sacred connection to nature until I came to La Medicina. It’s then that I developed a reverence and appreciation for Mother nature, among many other things, most importantly I developed a deep love for my self.
Self-love talk is everywhere, but self-love feelings are a whole separate thing. You can talk the talk, but can you walk the walk?
While at the cabin, I contemplated what my contribution is to this world, and what steps it will take for me to get where I want to go. I let my soul, heart, body and mind lead me, in that order. It’s The Path To Eden, or in simpler terms, the way to feeling personally satisfied, consistently.
When our soul is in the drivers seat of our lives, we are unshackled from the golden handcuffs that keep us in places where we feel stuck. The stuck part can seem like the hardest part, except that it’s familiar, and trust me when I say, it may seem more comfortable to remain in a place where you feel uncomfortably comfortable, than to break free from the familiar. To break free, you’ll have to spend some time in utter darkness. But do not be afraid of the darkness, it’s where the golden nuggets of treasure are.
I’ve spent years breaking away from territories (mental and physical) that left me feeling depleted and ineffective. It’s a process to recognize the patterns we hold to, that we long to let go of.
Yesterday I told my daughter who is six, after she shared her worries about me dying one day, that I can’t die until I fulfill my soul mission, which is to help liberate people in my community from the suffering that comes from playing small.
Playing small looks like; working in a job that is unfulfilling, being in a partnership that is lacking passion and growth, staying in the same place wishing, hoping, praying that something external will change the internal landscape and personal circumstance, not developing and sharing ones own art and talents.
I’ve spent many years in those states. And over many harrowing processes I slowly built up a mentality that fits my disposition and desire to live large, based off my own being-ness, talents, and desires.
One day I came across a teacher/mentor who gave me the confidence and faith in myself, using my own talents and abilities, to start taking writing seriously.
As I write this, my first book entitled ’The Path To Eden’ is on its way to making its debut. The cover of the book is being edited to fit my vision, my project manager is staying on top of things to ensure I stay on task, and the editor is ready to comb through my rough draft.
For the last 6 months I’ve made finishing the book my main priority. At first my desire to write the book was share simple, yet profound wisdom about the nature of life and the process it takes to become satisfied with it, but now I realize what I’m most excited about are all the doors that I think it will open, for me and my readers.
My mentor encouraged me to write every single day, and that by design, I will have created something unique and personal from a place of deep knowing. What the outcome is at this stage is anyone’s guess, but without his mentorship I wouldn’t have a rough-draft copy of a body of work that will come in handy for many, I pray.
I don’t worry about success, because I trust the process of life. I trust the feeling I get when I am writing.
I feel connected with the highest version of myself.
My point is that everyone needs a wing-man and/or wing-woman in their lives who will take them into the depths. These angels in disguise champion us knowing what it takes to live larger, freer, bolder, and as a result we are less afraid to shine by their association. They are living proof that it’s possible to thrive and succeed, and when we are beginners, it is vital that they share their confidence and faith with us when we feel afraid of both failure AND success. Our minds create strange stories that sometimes only a mentor can remedy. This is the benefit of true care and connection.
Even though I am a Psychedelic Love & Relationship guide to many, I still need a guide for myself, in the areas where I do not know what I do not know. Writing is one of my passions, so I enlisted a person who sees me genuinely and can provide assistance to me in ways that allow me to shine. And in that we are the same; we provide deep and wide knowing about a process.
Someone who sees you in a way that no one else does, because its safe to share all the voices in your head that tell you that you aren’t good enough, as well as help you stretch and reach beyond what you know, is essential and cannot be overstated.
If you know deep down that you are playing small, have talents that need fostering, and are wiling to expand into the greater awareness that is waiting for you to discover it, this is your sign to explore those feelings. If there is any anxiety or depression in your being ness, that is a sure sign that your soul is not satisfied with the life that you are living. You may be great-full for what you have, and that is good, but it’s not enough to live a life full of live, meaning and purpose.
In my last email I mentioned the opportunity to sit in sacred space with me for a time to commune together for your own good and the greater good of our shared community, but it is also beyond that. The experience is intended for you to get to know yourself, and for me to know you, so that we can make manifest that things that pull on your heart and soul strings.
I want to see you shine in this world. To make a contribution and leave a legacy that puts a smile on your face each morning when you wake up - for you to be great full to be full of you.
I am welcoming 6 people, at a very nominal price, to work with me privately, as well as in group. While we are in group, we will share what we’ve learned in our lives, and share our deepest yearnings, and I (and the group) will help you make manifest what it is that your soul desires. This is a leadership group.
The intention will be to work together to make manifest our highest hopes and dreams. The connections that will be cultivated in this sacred space will facilitate the merging of soul-families.
What this means is that each and every person who feels called to this space and time, by Universal design, will be meeting and connecting with people who they are destined to meet for reasons that will be made clear over time.
This is conscious matchmaking. Maybe some connections will be romantic, maybe they will be vocational or talent based, it’s anyone’s guess, but what I can guarantee you is that it will be healing, the connections made will cause your personal growth, AND it will be good.
6 week Psychedelic Integration Process & Soulful Curriculum begins:
Initial Group session: July 13th 7pm-7am (Woodland/Kamas area) - Connecting in Sacred Space
6 Private Sessions
3 Group Sessions (Salt Lake City Area)
$1300 per person (regularly priced at $2500)
Enrollment Begins Now, and ends on July 4th
(because it will take roughly 9 days to prepare for our journey together)
There are 153 people on this local email list (and growing everyday), and space is limited to 6 (7 including myself).
Will you be one of the people holding the Golden Ticket?
What is the cost of you NOT taking action?
Forward this message to refer a friend for this process and receive my appreciation and blessings.
Namasté Connected,
Marian xo
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